Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Open Letter

Dear Black Women,

I do a lot of reading (books, magazines, blogs, etc) and I've noticed a stigma when it comes to black women. It seems there are so many people telling you what's wrong with you. From relationship issues to physical features everyone has their opinion on why you are not happy, unsatisfied, mad or just plain undeserving. I don't feel that there are enough outlets that celebrate black womanhood. I did a post similar on blog in the past (click here to check it out). Hopefully this letter does you some justice.

First let me start with the first black woman in my life who is my everything. She gave me life. She nurtured me and helped shape me in the man that I am. Remember, you are what she is to me. You are the mother of this Earth. You birthed the first man. The first woman. Without you noone would be here. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Big ups to my moms.



The saying "Behind every strong man is a strong woman" seems cliché but it couldn't hold any truer when it comes to black men. Speaking as a black man we have to deal with so much in the world. So many preconceived ideas about who we are, what we aren't and what we can't do. It's so reassuring to have a black woman beside you to hold you up while dealing with her own issues. That takes strength, sturdiness and vigor.

Don't concern yourself with what other people (including other black women) might think of you. If you aren't married or don't have kids by a certain age don't feel pressured to do so because of social pressures or what others might think. If you feel like black men aren't acting right, expand your horizons (black men will do it in a heartbeat so why not you?). Don't feel pressured to change the way you look because guys ogle over a certain "type" they see on television. I promise there are plenty of men out there that appreciate you just the way you are.

Just know that you are appreciated even though sometimes it may not seem that way.


Sincerely,

Tunde

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yay! This is refreshing. I agree, a lot of magazines, radio talk shows etc. focus on what we're doing wrong, too much of, not enough of, or telling us what we need to change about ourselves. It's nice to know that some black men still celebrate black women.

Miss Davis said...

Simply, thank you!

Arniesa M. said...

Great piece of work! Excellent writing as usual. Thanks for showing Black women love.

I would write more but I'm on my phone and watching celeb rehab. Lol

Ms.Minx said...

Aww, so sweet of ya, Tunde! :)

Milan said...

awww! Dig THAT! Thank you, Fav. Great post. Much appreciated.

Unique&Parsimonious Bride said...

VERY BEAUTIFUL!

Brandi said...

Thank you for this post!!! I see so many of my friends getting upset because they haven't gotten the ring by whatever age and they are driving themselves crazy. I like that this is coming from a man, because when it comes from me they feel that I can't relate because I'm married. So again thanks!!!

Ms. Sylaneous said...

Awww Tunde,
Thanks!

(See, this is another reason I love my friends... ya'll always seem to know what to say and when to say it!)

Abena said...

What a sweet post!

Reecie said...

You already know how I feel. but the post is very nice. :-)

N.I.A. naturally... said...

Lovely post, Tunde!! Definitely appreciated!!

Robin said...

I was just having a conversation with another friend of mine about the "ills of the black woman".

Thank you for this post...every now we need a little encouragement.

The F$%K it List said...

That was simply awesome. Thank you!

rashida said...

Beautiful.

DJ Martian Man Hunter said...

I see you out here. Powerful letter, can't cosign wholeheartedly but I'll blog about why..