Vagina Is For Lovers

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I'm back

I'm back (no T.I.). Haven't blogged in a minute. I was actually thinking about shutting my blog down. As I've always stated I don't blog about my personal life as too many people know me in real life that read my site. I guess my multiple disclaimers didn't translate too well with some of my readers. On the flip side I don't like being told to write a certain way or what I should and shouldn't write on. The subject matter of which I decide to write on is my choice seeing as how I'm the only writer for this blog and the subject matter is a direct correlation of my view point.

I would like to thank #oneofmyfollowers for encouraging me to not stop writing. I write because I enjoy writing. It's my release. She suggested that I just take a break but don't let other people dictate what I like to do.

With that said, I'm back!

I'll probably start regularly blogging again next week. I have some topics that I really want to write about but I can't remember most of them since I got locked out of my blackberry and lost a lot of information that I had saved on it. I copped one of these the other day:

I'm also thinking about doing some video blogs. Maybe I'll make it into a weekly series. Tunde Confessions or something like that. I have some hilarious friends and I rarely have dull moments so I plan documenting a few things. **If you see me around with a camera, don't fret, I won't post footage of you without your consent [maybe]** Oh yeah and the camera is waterproof so I foresee a lot of poolside foolery going on as well. If you have any ideas about subject matter on which you would like to see me touch, hit me up.

Stay tuned.

Freaky Friday- Come [Cum] Inside Me

With the amount of rain and thunderstorms that have passed through Nashville this weekend coupled with the fact that I haven't even had a sniffle of yssup since [insert reference to whatever you think a long time is], I felt that I should do a freaky Friday post. The sound of rain beating against my window pane makes me want to beat against that pain till I hear the sound of rain. Alas, I'm not getting any anytime soon until Conclave next weekend so for now I have the sweet voice Minnie Ripperton yodeling sweet nothings in my ear.

Inside My Love has to be one my favorite songs ever. You can take this song to mean different things depending on your mind frame. Being as though I'm a deviant, I see it from that point of view. Here's my take on the song. Minnie sings of two strangers meeting yet they have this connection. Even though the song was released in 1975 during the era of free love, this song clearly speaks on those ideals. Meeting a stranger and having sex and even letting them cum inside you would not go over so well as a song today. Here are some excerpts from the song.

Two people, just meeting
Barely touching each other
Two spirits greeting
Trying to carry it further
You are one and I am another
We should be one inside each other

You can see inside me
Will you come inside me?
Do you wanna ride inside my love?
You can see inside me
Will you come inside me?
Do you wanna ride inside my love?

I find this song very sexy. A few artists have remade this song over the years. One notable person is Trina Brousssard. This track is on the Love Jones soundtrack [shoutout to #oneofmyfollowers for mailing me the DVD ;-)]. Chante Moore also remade the song but no one did it better than Minnie Ripperton.

Profanity

My name is Tunde and I curse. Like a sailor even.

Do I see this as a problem? Not hardly. In fact I only believe there is one real curse word. *shrug* I'm taking it you can guess what that curse what is. No. Well it's "fuck". See told you I like to curse. Where was I? Oh yeah, those other pseudo curse words don't count in my book.

curse (v)- to use profanely insolent language against.

I mean it's not like I curse uncontrollably. I don't curse in professional environments. I don't curse around my mother. I don't think I've ever cursed in front of my mother. I try not to curse around my father. I guess cursing is a part of my vernacular just like any other slang word is to my regional dialect. For instance, being from the DC Metro area, I say the word "young" a lot. Sometimes subconsciously. When I first moved to Nashville I had a couple of people ask me what "young" meant. I just shrugged them off because honestly it's one of those things that if you don't know then you just don't know. I've noticed when I'm talking to my mentor or any of my professors the word "young" would never leave my lips.

About a month or so ago one of my facebook friends had an update about the Lakers winning the championship. Being the ultimate Laker hater that I am, I responded with "Na Son". After some back and forth I simply replied, "f*#@ kobe". Now at the time I really didn't see anything wrong with what I wrote. I mean I thought I censored myself well enough. It wasn't until she replied "I would like to keep my wall G-rated. Thank you.", did I realize that even though I censored myself that the intention was still there. I guess I could have wrote something like "forget kobe" or something similar but I don't think it would have had the same effect.

Perhaps I should think about how my language affects others. Perhaps I shouldn't.

Do you guys curse regularly? Do you get offended when people curse in your presence? C'mon tell me how the fuck you feel. lolol

Abyss

This girl was no good for me
she had so many secrets, secrets..yeah
Even though she wasn't my main girl
I was still committed, it was me and you
you said you wouldn't tell
but you saved my voicemails
but I always knew

So now cry 'till you drown your face
and bitch I give a damn how harsh this may seem

I'm here to put your heart in its place
chained up at the bottom of the lake
Now let the waterfall abyss.

The Dream, Abyss

The other day my boo wrote this blog post on her review of The Dream's Love King album. I know quite a few people that aren't fans of the album but I am. I'm actually a fan of his entire catalog. Dude knows how to make hits. Back to the topic at hand, my favorite track off of the album is Abyss. As we were discussing my favorite song she said, "it scares me that that's your favorite song." I think that what she failed to realize is the extent of male psyche when it comes to matters of the heart.

What most don't know is that men can be as emotional as women. The difference is how we display these emotions. In most cases when a woman breaks a man's heart they only know of the phase when men become closed off emotionally and try to get over their pain by hurting as many other women as possible. Before this stage there is definitely the fuck you stage. What's the fuck you stage? The fuck you stage is right before emotional disconnect and right after capriciousness. This stage allows men express their emotions through anger. Anger is just like any other emotion. The only thing is that anger can actually help us to realize that we are masking our feelings of another nature, such as anxiety, hurt or frustration.

I've definitely had feelings that come with the fuck you stage. It's more than hurt. It's anger. A lot of men won't admit that they let a women get to them in such a way. I've been hurt that way once. Will it happen again? I don't know but back to the song. My favorite part of the song is: "So now cry 'till you drown your face and bitch I give a damn how harsh this may seem." I think it might be the extra emphasis on the word bitch. I don't make it a habit of calling women bitches but sometimes the word just fits ( if you are offended then remain offended).

It would be nice if I could get more guys to comment on this post. Question time. Fellas have you ever been to the point where you felt like you were in the fuck you stage? Women have you ever done this to a guy? You can be honest. How did you handle the situation?

The Highlight Reel

The highlight reel.

I'm not talking about tuning into Sports Center during the last 10 minutes of each hour to catch the top 10 plays of the day or even logging into youtube to watch career highlight plays by Deion Sanders. What I'm speaking about here is the sex highlight reel.

Sex highlight reel- A sexual experience so fantastic that you find yourself replaying the events in your mind months and even years later. This mental rolodex of sexual feats can be summoned for a number of reasons, which I won't get into here.

I've been familiar with the idea of the sex highlight reel for some time now but i never really knew what to call it until I saw Couple's Retreat. This movie details the specifics of the highlight reel. They go further to say that when you are having sex with a person and the experience is less than stellar, you can close your eyes and fall back on the highlight reel. The question put forth is that in a sense cheating?

Based on the 49 people that I've slept with in my life I have a highlight reel but it really isn't that extensive.[1] It would have to be a pretty big ego boost to know that you are in someone's highlight reel. To have that much of a lasting effect on someone has to mean that you are pretty incredible. That being said I'm pretty sure I'm in a couple of top 10 plays on a couple of highlight reels. #onmycockyshit

[1]- I hope you wouldn't think I would actually list my body count. lololol

Perfect Decision

I get the best feeling in the world when you say hi or even smile at me because I know, even if its just for a second, that I've crossed your mind. ~ Author Unknown

****Before I begin let me make the disclaimer that this has nothing to do with me. Shame that I still have to make disclaimers but it's whatever. Guarantee I'll still get inquires as to whom I'm talking about. ****

Last week I was listening to Vivian Green's sophomore album titled Vivian. The lyrics to the song Perfect Decision has been stuck in my head ever since. The thing I love about Vivian is her strong voice and powerful lyrics. As you can tell by the quoted (below) she sings about things that I'm sure we've all been through.

The skin against my skin
I'm begging to resist
I want to scream for more
I want to run out the door
The skin against my skin
The skin of my best friend
We never even kissed
So how'd we get to this?
He loves me oh so much
But he never shared his touch
As natural as it feels
I don't want it to kill
Something so flawless
That we both cherish
And as bad as I need it
We could ruin something so perfect

This is a dangerous, volatile situation. Falling for someone who is your friend is a dangerous, slippery slope. Going down that path with someone who knows certain things about you, who knows intimate details about you can seem like a good idea.

You become good friends with a person and you hang out with them all the time then gradually you realize that you are falling for them. What do you do? How do you handle these feelings for a friend? Will it ruin the friendship?

First, this is a common situation. Many, many friends become closer and closer and then start thinking about dating. It's only natural. There are hundreds of movies about this situation. These movies sometimes turn out to have fairy tale endings or not so happy endings. It's the ideal way to start a relationship, because all relationships should be based on trust, honesty and communication. These are traits that friends have built in. An ideal relationship is between best friends who love each other. Key word being ideal.

The one question that has to be asked, is what happens when the relationship doesn't pan out? What happens to the friendship that was so valued? These are questions that Vivian also asked herself.

What if we want more from each other?
What if we become only part-time lovers?
What if our drama-free friendship suffers?
What if everything we've built get lost under the covers?
Will I think it's the same the way you scream out my name
Thought it would ever come to this
Who'd thought I'd like your touch, your kiss
I don't wanna miss this opportunity, maybe we're suppose to be
Stop askin questions, and guessing and keep it going

Have you ever taken a friendship to the next level? How did it work out for you? Do you think it's a good idea to risk a friendship for moments of passion or even a relationship?