Twitter Groupies

I spend a lot of time on twitter. I follow maybe 280 people. Some are celebrities but a lot I know in reality. Out of the celebrities that I follow, I do tweet to some when they ask a question or if they say something interesting. If I find that a celebrity doesn't have anything interesting to say, then I'm quick to un-follow. I mostly tweet about music so of the rappers/singers that I do mention I usually use their twitter handle. (looking through my list) Here is a list of celebrities that I follow:

• Talib Kweli
• Janelle Monae
• Dondria
• Vivian Green
• James Harden
• Jeff Green
• Rudy Gay
• Lupe Fiasco
• Naledge (Kidz in the Hall)
• Chad Ochocinco
• J Cole
• Dwight Howard
• Fabolous
• Chuck Inglish (The Cool Kids)
• Kevin Durant
• Phonte
• Wale
• Marsha Ambrosius
• Ludacris
• Keri Hilson

With that said there are numerous celebrities that I used to follow and for one reason or another (probably because they're a lot dumber than I thought they were) I stopped following them:

• Puffy
• Reagan Gomez
• Tia Mowry
• Trey Songz
• Pusha T
• Malice

What really grinds my gears when it comes to some of my followers and celebrities is when they transcend the line between fan and twitter groupie. What defines a twitter groupie you ask? This isn't exactly a science but in fact just my opinion.

-If you tweet to a celebrity more than 6 times a day or 42 times a week (and they never tweet you back), then you might be a twitter groupie.

-If more than 40% of your follow list consists of celebrities you might be a twitter groupie.

-If you genuinely get upset or jealous when you see someone else tweets to your favorite celebrity then you might be a twitter groupie.

-If you send pictures of yourself in compromising positions to celebrities then you might be a twitter groupie.

The hypocrisy that occurs when it comes to groupies is hilarious to me. Especially on Sundays. During "Basketball Wives", it's interesting to see the amount of shade that gets thrown the way of the women on the show for being groupies having relations with NBA players. Some of these same women who bash the "Basketball Wives" will turn around and e-throw their panties at Trey Songz or tell Keri Hilson that they want to Slow Dance with her (yes Twitter groupies can be men as well).

Its actually sad and pathetic when you see a person tweet to a certain celebrity time and time again, day after day in the hopes that they might recognize them and tweet back. Some celebrities have upwards of hundreds of thousands of followers. I have about 450 and even I miss @ replies sometimes. I can imagine how many someone like Fabolous gets every couple of minutes.

I wrote all this to say that a twitter groupie can be just as bad as regular groupie. Maybe worse because if anyone on your timeline follows the same celebrity they can see your shenanigans. If you are offended by this post then you're probably a twitter groupie and take from that what you will.

What Chili Wants

This weekend Nashville experienced record-breaking rain, flooding and deaths. Needless to say I've been stuck in the house for the latter part of the last 36 hours. Because of this I got a chance to completely catch up on my DVR and other shows that came on television. I just finished watching this show, What Chili Wants. Thanks to twitter I've heard various things about this show but I never got a chance to watch it myself. This was completely by choice because I definitely watch the Brandy & Ray-J show (which comes on right after).

Apparently like every other C-list celebrity that's looking for love, VH-1 decided to give her a shot. My immediate thoughts are that Chili is kind of self-righteous and definitely too picky. I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with having standards but Tionna (the girl setting her up on dates) picked out a variety of men. Based on the tweets from a lot of the women in my timeline some of these guys seemed like winners and they would love to go on dates with most of them.

In my opinion, Chili's problem is that she has a long check list in her mind of what she wants in a man. Check lists aren't the problem as long as the items on the list are realistic. Nothing is wrong with wanting a partner who is generous, nice, intelligent, ambitious, good with children, etc. When your list starts comprising items such as: can't eat pork, has to be this tall, can't drink at all, etc. you will start to alienate yourself.

My first solution to Chili's issues is that she is LOOKING for a man. Whatever happened to letting a man find you? Proverbs 18:22 says "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord." It says nothing about she who finds a husband. Chili really has the game twisted. Maybe her messing around with Usher has her outlook and perception on dating all messed up (yep #shots).

Second, Chili acts real self-righteous. I'm not saying that she doesn't have the right to be but lets face it. She has stated on her show that she really wants to have another child. Let's run down her statistics. According to Wikipedia, she is 39 years old and a single mother. Personally I just wouldn't be excited about going into a situation with a woman knowing that it would be a ready-made family type thing. At damn near 40, based on child bearing years, she's pretty ancient. She also has a lot of baggage as far as previous relationships in the public eye (Dallas Austin, Usher, Floyd Mayweather and T.J. Holmes). That being said Chili has many flaws just like the men she dates so for her not to even give most of them a chance seems a little sanctimonious.

What Chili Wants is a microcosm of what occurs in society today. I see it on twitter a lot as well with trending topics such as #ICouldNeverDate. Everyone wants to say what they won't put up with and what is wrong with the dating pool that they are exposed to. My advice is to look within yourself first because I guarantee most times the things that you say you won't tolerate, you probably exude. That's just my advice. Rozonda Thomas (or whoever this fits), take it how you will.

***added video***

#onmycockyshit

As I sit on my couch on this magnificent Monday afternoon I couldn't help but think of how great I am. I know what you're asking yourself, "What makes Tunde so great?". Well don't fret, I'm about to tell you.

The first step to being great is to have confidence in yourself because if you don't believe in you then who will? I like this song called New York by Ja Rule. It features Fat Joe and Jadakiss. Kiss has this bar that makes so much sense to me:

I'm not cocky, I'm confident

So when you tell me I'm the best

It's a compliment.

Now let me tell you why I'm so great.

I had a staring contest with the sun and won. Eclipse.

I'm the reason why Waldo is hiding. Let me know if you see him.

I once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.

I ordered a Big Mac at Burger King last week, and got one.

I don't teabag girls, I potato sack them.

I once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made me blink.

Ok I didn't do any of these things. Chuck Norris did. I'm still awesome though.

I even started my own trending topic on twitter (#onmycockyshit).

Do you feel yourself (pause)? Do you think the sun rises and shines on your ass? Are you your biggest fan? Tell me why you're so great.

#hoshit

I see right through your shenanigans.

This past week Spring was officially bitch-slapped by Summer and told to get to the back of the line. We went from nice temperatures of low to mid 70's to the high 80's. Its been nice enjoying this weather. The bruhs have been cooking out all week (not like that's anything out of the norm) and my friends and I have been on our happy hour patio flow.

The subject I wanted to touch on in this blog post are the articles of clothing some women sport when the temperatures reach a certain level. I understand and appreciate the amount of skin that is revealed. What I'm not a fan of is #hoshit and/or women who wear clothes that are two sizes to small. Neither one is appealing to my eyes or my taste and I would rather you stay out of my line of vision. In my opinion there is a difference between being sensual and suggestive and being trashy and trifling.

Maybe its my fault because I can filter out #hoshit. I understand the reasoning behind some women's logic. "I'm not really that cute in the face so let me wear the lowest cut shirt I can find so I can display my breasts for the world to see. Maybe guys will look past the disappointment that I call my face and be hypnotized by my double D's." or how about "I know I'm a 16 but lets see if I can squeeze into this size 12. Yeah my rolls will be exposed but it makes my ass seem so much bigger. Maybe he won't think about the craters I have in my ass once I take off my clothes." I really can't fault the logic some women use because 75% (underestimating) of dudes will fall for this game hook, line and sinker. This will produce a lot of inflated egos. Which will lead to what I like to call:

a margin of error on the scale

What's does that mean? Well I'm glad you asked. Lets say a woman is around a 5 on the scale. She's not really that cute in the face but she has a fairly decent size ass and she has a C cup. She wears very revealing clothes so she gets hit on all day by random dudes. What she doesn't realize is that 9 out of the 10 dudes who try to holla at her don't even know what color her eyes are. She begins to believe that she is cuter than she is and in her mind she rates herself about an 8. Far be it for me to knock for woman for having confidence but lets be real. If said woman didn't have the body that she flaunts she would not get second looks. Now she is a 5 with an 8's attitude. Then she comes across a guy like me who can see past the gimmick and with her attitude I now think she's a 3.

What do you think of my theory on #hoshit and the increase of it now that its getting hot out? Am I just a pompous asshole? Do you participate in #hoshit?